I was falling in love
But no one caught my fall
I trust fell through love
and I continued to fall deeper through love
Until I fell past love
Past the illusion of it
Half way between infinity and half way away from here
This depth — where there is two doors
This most existential of dimensions
One door is the illusion that you are loved
The other is the illusion that you are not loved
Both equally open and inviting but I choose the door in the left
Where I am loved
And more free still, even more free
a voice , not my own, asks “this isn’t reality, is it?”
And I answer, in a voice also not my own, “no,
this is not.”
Humans are confused by consciousness and controlled by subconsciousness
At least that’s what the doctors decided to share with me today
and I shared with him, the one thought that gives me solace nowadays is that no matter what it is, when it is, or how it is… everything
Absolutely everything is
Somewhere.
That place is here, with me.