Subsidence

Subsidence.

I count backwards now, to help me cope with the loss. I cope with the dissonance and gorge, the chasm. I live on both sides of the canyon, shouting to myself from the other side. Up here, in my mind, is one side. I make up the whole world, and I believe it too.

Alejandro, half of what you think is made up. Its the world you wish you lived in, the world you want to be living in.

Half of that half, the half that matches the actual world, is close to real. Now, half of the half that is close to real, that is unknown. A plausibility, but now 6% of true. Three percent, 3%, is just the physical laws of depth, distance, and weight. It’s the weight that gets you, you don’t want the heaviness of the real world. So, one and a half of the 3%, is the mystery everyone lives with, the monster under the bed. This is a certainty, everyone, absolutely everyone lives with the reality that no one knows what is really going on and what all this, the universe?, is.

We are so close to zero now, Alejandro. Well, let’s just call it zero. The world of your mind is in no way, zero ways, the world of the walking dream. The earth, the planet, where they live, what they think and want.

Now we are in the truth of the matter, at zero. Now, we can go into the negative, the irrational, the infinitesimal, the wildly inaccurate estimations of this thing called life. I know you believe yourself to be different from them, so different you are scared to write exactly how different you are from them. But, you are just like everyone else. And if you can be at zero percent 0% accuracy, so can everyone else. Now, lets say, while we are here, on the other side, everyone is more than inaccurate but wholly, entirely, and totally, wrong about everything. We can say that, but then what.

I know you hate questions in your writing but lets let this one slide.

We are wrong. From step one, square one, wrong. Because, like any mathematical operation, one fallacy at the start will lead to incorrection at every point there after.

Answer the question, answer it like it is a reasonable possibility.

I don’t know either. But you don’t have to believe anything anymore, because any and all beliefs are only another step in this grand operation of actuality that started with a misstep. You have your freedom now my boy.

Don’t own this, don’t get too involved, because you are evolved. You are evolved because you know enough to not believe what has been both offered and fed, forced or plated. But the food is make believe, a banquet of imagination. It’s the best guess of many men who lived long, long, ago. It’s the gossip of the ages, the chisme of mouths hungry for truth, for a hot dish.

So, no, please don’t feel too bad about what life is, what love is, and why this world just doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to you. Don’t buy or believe your pain or heartbreaks, just let your desire be your guide. Now, that’s truth.

I know you don’t like questions on your page. But you do remember the first time you ate a pussy. That’s truth for you, plain and simple.

When you get lucky, be glad and grateful for it. But I suspect what you suspect is right, the world knows, like a flower knows to bloom. Like those pretty yellow poppies know when to come up. Something knows and we can know that something knows.

But if we think we know, there really isn’t a whole lot of room for the real truth to do what its supposed to do.

What comes to you , let it come. What goes from you , let it go.